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Mafia Gazette Past Issue 49
The Mafia Gazette Issue 49 For All The News That Is News Thursday 3rd November 'MADE WOMAN'S LIFE AT STAKE ' By: Frances This morning the Gazette got wind of a two million dollar hit on Kiss_This's head. Who has such funds to pay up once this hit goes through, if it does go through at all? While sitting in jail CapoTea was heard bragging about his new bodyguard and all the shots he's made that morning. He then adjusted his jumpsuit and moved away from the bars to boast "And now, LittleCeez is offering me 2 million to kill Kiss_This. Man, could this day get any better?" before he cowered away because he heard Bubba's footsteps. Once he was sprung out of jail by some of his friends he flew to LA, where he knew Kiss_This was in her Bar. He sent a letter before hand, trying to clear the rumours of him wanting to kill her, offering her friendship and reassuring her that she would be safe from him. Right after Kiss_This sent her response CapoTea boarded a plane with its destination LA, to meet Kiss_This and put a bullet through her head. Kiss_This’s recently hired bodyguard was at the front gate when CapoTea rushed up pretending to be a friend wanting to visit. When the Body Guard wouldn’t let CapoTea in, he pulled out a gun and attempted to fire shots in the direction of Kiss_This. Unfortunately his plans were ruined when the body-guard pulled out his own gun and shot CapoTea three times: Twice in the chest and once in the head. As CapoTea fell to the ground clutching his wounds he muttered "Kiss_This Is in LA, Atttttacccccck." Is this the end of these attacks on Kiss_This, or will this be going on all day? 'PRIESTHOOD QUESTIONED OVER DEATH ' By: Tea_Jenny Early Tuesday evening, an angry young man with an 'unusual' name came to the streets in an outrage following the death of his father, dropkick. The young man claims that PriestHood opened fire and killed his father without reason leaving him with no father and no inheritance, everything his father had worked so hard for gone. When PriestHood seen the crowd gathering on the street they soon came out to defend themselves saying that the mans father had shot first then going on to say that PriestHood may have made mistakes in the past but have now risen above all that. Everyone else who was in the crowd had to get an opinion in too some debating the respect that PriestHood has on our streets and others just wondering why the young man had bothered coming to the streets with this rather than just getting over it. I spoke to both parties involved, Dropkicks son told me that his father had never fired a bullet except for one wackback when he was attacked previously, but says that PriestHood claimed that he had shot at them and killed him before he had a chance to set things straight. Someone I spoke to on behalf of PriestHood told me that Dropkick had shot at a member of their family while other family members were being attacked simultaneously, he went on to say that as far as PriestHood knew this was a coordinated attack and they were forced to act quickly, although any proof they may have had of these attacks now unfortunately seem to be gone. He told me PriestHood are sorry if his son feels hard done by but said that they have had a word with him since the incident and and seem to believe that things are now sorted between the two parties. After the mistakes PriestHood have made in the past (I'm sure you remember the NY lockdown) they claim to have changed for the better. Is Dropkicks son lying, was this a random killing or maybe just an honest mistake? 'NEWSPAPER CRITICISED FOR STORY ' Following on from the article yesterday concerning the supposed hit on Kiss_This, the newspaper has been criticised for advertising the alleged two million dollar hit on the Made Woman. Certain individuals believed that the newspaper should not have included the item about the anonymous letter containing the threat to one of the community’s leaders, and one even stated that they thought the editor should not have made the letter public or passed on the contents to Kiss_This. We at the Gazette believe that the community has a right to know if there is a threat to the leaders and why the alleged hit was placed. The source of the letter has yet to be discovered, as a third party has been acting as intermediary for the unknown sender. Several questions have been asked of the intermediary, but they have apparently been unable to contact the source. The Gazette would like to contact the individual concerned to get a direct statement from them, but this is proving impossible. Several people have claimed that although the letter called the Made Woman a coward, the very fact of the anonymity and dealing through a third party despite the Gazette’s reputation for confidentiality, has branded the letter writer as a coward themselves. One person has stated that LittleCeez may be the source of the hit and this is under investigation, although in previous enquiries made by the Gazette, it was impossible to get a statement or even questions answered by the Citizen who has hired contracts previously, using the WildBoyz as his agents of death. The newspaper will continue to report any news that is brought into the office, although it should be noted that anything unconfirmed will be stated as such, or marked as alleged. Despite some unpopularity, the Gazette will be remaining on the streets and will continue to bring you all the news that is news from the community. 'LETTERS PAGE ' If you have any views or opinions you would like to see in the Gazette, please write in your letters to the Gazette Offices in Chicago. Dear Carmela, Whats the deal? We finally get a madewoman, who comes out on the streets and adresses us and everyone wants her dead. DOES ANYONE WANT TO SEE WHATS THE NEXT STEP?! ANYONE?! ARE YOU OUT THERE?! Lets think about this shall we? Shes well spoken, seems nice enough, Sure she has a facial deformity but that just makes her special. What exactly has she done to get her on a hitlist for 2 million? Is it because shes achieved what you can not? Are you all scared that with your Tiny peniseses that a woman, gasp shock horror, may be able to do something the other mademen wernt able to do? Give her a chance for goodness sake. Its not like shes going to make anything any worse that it already is. Hell, Im glad a set of Knockers is on top. And you all should be too. Ovaries or not, she deserves it. If she had a scrotum and came to the streets with the same speech Id offer him my ovaries, but thats neither here nor there. Point is, back the fuck off, Give her a chance. Lets see where it takes us. If you're that ashamed of the woman in power rank your stupid ass up and join her. So get your damn finger off the trigger and pop a viagra and then go rob an old lady or something. Jesus, you people are all going to be the death of me. Literally. Love always and forever, Cooter J. Poo 'WE HEAR THAT… ' Gossip Column By: Trixie ....Trixie will be taking a break from being the gossip queen. She left a brief note about an assylum and Dead ant's and pound cake and calling every once in a while o report what she sees. But she said she'll miss you all and that she wants your babies. Except Tie's. Because he has a thing for boys. 'CLASSIFIEDS ' Anyone wishing to place an ad should send it in to CarmelaDeAngelis at the Gazette Offices in Chicago. All ads are free, but must still fall within the set guidelines. 02:30, February 15, 2013 (UTC)02:30, February 15, 2013 (UTC)02:30, February 15, 2013 (UTC)Hice19 (talk) 02:30, February 15, 2013 (UTC) ** Horses for sale!! ** 1 Muddy Maniac $575,000 2 Angry Revolver $1,675,000 (very high earning horse) 3 Brilliant Democrat $1,725,000 Cthis weeks special deal, a super, super earner) 4 Bitter Fish $845,000 5 Stormy Snake $900,000 (Reduced from $1,200,000) 6 Sexy Chick $800,000 7 Jedi Snoball $1,250,000 (Consistent winner) 8 Undercover Bastard $400,000 Buy more than one, get money off!! Ask about our insurance scheme: the horse doesn't pay, neither do you!* No reasonable offer refused! MobMail JohnDavidson2 * Terms & Conditions apply 02:30, February 15, 2013 (UTC)02:30, February 15, 2013 (UTC)02:30, February 15, 2013 (UTC)Hice19 (talk) 02:30, February 15, 2013 (UTC) 'Anyone wishing to submit articles should do so by 10am Mafia time on the day of publications. Articles will be paid for on an individual basis. Please contact CarmelaDeAngelis, Editor of The Mafia Gazette, at the Gazette Offices, Chicago. All articles must conform to the guidelines available in the booklet “Newspaper Recruiting” available on the newsstand. '